Adjustments

O.K., now where did I leave off. We were all home. Frankie was loving me, and being so appreciative for everything. I would get big hugs in the grocery for buying him bananas! Life was seeming pretty great. But he did not take to Allie. Allie is my daughter who is also from China. She had probably been the sibling most excited about her new brother coming home. He was from China like her.....she was telling everyone, and she couldn't wait for him to be her brother. I have to admit, I was also very excited for her to have another family member that was Chinese. When he got home she tried so hard to help him with english and getting his needs across. He did not take to this and the more she tried to help him the more he pushed her away. He began to pick her out as a target....and she began to feel his rejection. This caused her to begin having difficulties at school, need lots of extra loving from mom and dad, and overall she began to be sad, then angry. The more Frankie saw he was upsetting her, the more he pushed the limits. He tends to do that still with all of us. If he knows he is upsetting you, he likes to continue with increased determination and joy. He adores Joshua. Which truly is a blessing from God. They have become brothers. But even still if Frankie is doing something that is annoying Josh and Josh asks him to stop, Frankie's response is to get a big smile and do it all the more. Which can I  admit, can be very frustrating. We reached a low point one afternoon, when Frankie got angry at Allie and charged her and began punching her. We quickly intervened....explaining to him that we do not hit and it would not be tolerated, and I have to say he has not hit anyone again. A huge success! His personality is to be very stubborn. I am thinking this trait enabled him to survive his life in the orphanage. He has shared many difficult stories of how hard things were in the past. He is a very brave boy. He doesn't let anything stop him from doing what he wants to. His special need of limb difference is non existent. There is nothing he can't do. I strongly recommend anyone ever considering adopting a child with this type of special need, absolutely do it. They will encourage and inspire you beyond imagine. I had put a lot of thought into what kind of clothes I bought him, including running shoes that didn't have ties. Well, he even ties shoes effortlessly.  I would say the only thing he can't do is tie those little ties inside sweat pants which can be annoying for any of us. So, as the honeymoon stage began to end, I began to have daily interactions with Frankie's teachers as he began refusing to do what he was suppose to do in school. He took things that were not his, refused to sit when the other kids were sitting, and refused to try to do the work. This was always followed up by an evening with the translator trying to discipline through the use of a machine that I was never really sure was saying what I thought it was saying. When we discipline Frankie he shuts down completely. That remains to this day. He refuses to speak, and not really sure he is even listening at those moments, although the use of translators is down to a minimum now, (only 4 and a half months later!) Amazing! I would never have imagined he would pick up English this quickly. All the things I was prepared to struggle with, aren't a struggle at all. Although he wasn't always doing what he was suppose to he continued to love going to school so we let him. But I have to admit, I couldn't wait for summer break. I was feeling we desperately needed time for bonding with in our family. I needed to focus on just that. I reached out for help a couple of times from our adoption agency FTIA, and was given very helpful guidance and advice. I have to say again they are truly wonderful and I am forever grateful to them. I could get really emotional when I think of how they have been there for us before and after his adoption. I am going to post a few pictures of our new son shortly after getting home and will give an update shortly that will bring us up to the present. Thanks so much for following.